Pretend chocolate that isn’t really chocolate and something that just doesn’t work. What’s sad is that the not chocolate gets our nod of approval and the actual chocolate doesn’t. These are troubling times, but you can rest assured we will protect you, nurture you, and coddle your little snowflake souls when selecting a confection is just too difficult of a task for you. You’re welcome.
Episode #78: Unicorns & Darkness
This episode is brought to you by the fact that attempting to improve on something that’s just fine already isn’t all that great a thing, where we are concerned. I mean, sometimes it works, but then they did the newer Star Wars movies and robbed us all of hours of our lives. At least there’s The Mandalorian now, but it seems almost criminal that Disney has anything to do with a sci-fi (oh wait – Star Wars isn’t science fiction, it’s a fantasy saga in a dead culture). Star Trek is infinity better than Star Wars.
Episode #77: m&m’s Macadamia Meh
On one have you have the bland and on the other you have the smothing insanity of the oiliness. Again, it is the legened.
Episode #75: Milky Reese’s Feces
Well, the title is apt insofar as Hans is concerned, but for Kit both ends of the stick point to bleah.
Episode 65: Brazil Yay! California Bleah…
Talento amendoas e passas – Brazil
While Hans found this one to the the ultimate, Kit wasn’t completely sold on it, but thought it was pretty good.
Kit – 3.5 out of 5.0
Hans 5.0 out of 5.0
Get some here
Ticket Chocolates Grasshopper Pie – California, United States
Kit was a little worried about the inclusion of grasshoppers at the outset, but assured of their lack of inclusion set her at ease. Unfortunately, we found spearmint instead of peppermint here which disappointed.
Kit 0 out of 5.0 stars
Hans 1.5 out of 5.0 stars
This one. This one was rough. So there’s a microphone above us. It’s a Rode microphone. And it’s screwed up. It sucks. What can I do? At least there was the audio from the front camera. But right after the first review you’ll hear some scratchy sounds. That’s the above microphone. So yeah.
A Tangled Honeycomb Of Roses & Dolomite
When fierce beauty and attention to detail collide, worlds crumble in this stunning new offering from The Chocolate Break – a new era in the way you think and feel about everything relating to anything you don’t regard as important or the concept of importance, itself.
Episode 59: Eat More Dolfin Every Day
We’ve found that unless you use the chocolate, it goes bad. Doing episodes once in a while just won’t cut it – nor will not looking at expiration dates on bars when we purchase them. These next two episodes are devoted to the chocolate that must be tried before it dies.
Episode 53: About To Expire!
Oh boy it’s the 4th of July! I’d rather a 5th of Beethoven though and the mix of these two would probably drown oneself if partaken with a 5th of hard liquor. unsafe and insane.
Episode 50: Ferrero Rochet & Crunchie
Oh stop it. We all get zits from time to time and yeah they range from tiny and no big deal to holy cow is that thing breathing/has it a control drone hovering above that has some kind of invisible control mechanism giving it intelligence. One of the items today seemed like a big zit – although very tasty. So yeah.
Episode 46: Toblerone, Skor, Ripple & Tiny Zits
Toblerone White Chocolate With Honey & Almond Nougat – Switzerland
Triangular prisms and white chocolate with funny stuff going on.
Hans – 1 1/2 stars
Kit – 3 1/2
Get some – http://bit.ly/tobleronebar
Galaxy Ripple – United Kingdom
A long painful bowel movement style bar.
Kit – 1 star
Hans – 0 stars
Get some – http://bit.ly/galaxyripple
Hershey’s Match Mochi – Japan
A tiny little booby or a big zit.
Hans – 3 stars
Kit – 2 stars
Get some here – http://bit.ly/hersheyschocolate
Hershey’s Skor – United States
Skor is a candy bar produced by The Hershey Company. It was first marketed in the United States in 1981 and later launched in Canada in 1983. “Skör” (with umlaut dots over the “o”) is Swedish for “brittle”, and the crown that appears in the product’s logo is identical to that found in the Swedish national emblem of Tre Kronor (“Three Crowns“). However, most read the name as “Skor” since you do not see the umlaut dots. Skor is the Swedish name for shoes. It was originally intended as the competition for the Heath bar produced by the Heath Company and, later, the Leaf Candy Company. Despite Hershey’s acquisition of Leaf, Inc., in 1996 and subsequent production of the Heath bar under the Hershey name, the company continues to market the Skor bar.
Kit – 4 stars
Hans – 3 stars
Get some – http://bit.ly/skorbar
Hey how are you today? No? Oh, that’s too bad. Well, here’s some special neato things from the 2018 Northwest Chocolate Festival that should make you die a little more.
Ecuador, Fresno, & Dubai
Villakuyaya Organic Dark Chocolate Masala Chai – Ecuador
Just an amazing amount of chai masala in this and it really fascinateds us.
Get your Villakuyaya here – http://bit.ly/villakuyaya
Kit – 3 1/2 out of 5
Hans – 4 1/2 out of 5
Raphio 72% Clementines Olive Oil – Fesno, California
A neat looking bar with a very nice orange taste to it – at least Hans thinks so.
Get your Raphio here – http://bit.ly/raphiochocolate
Kit – 1 out of 5
Hans – 5 out of 5
Mirzam Chocolate Makrers – Quinoa With Date Syrup – Dubai
We both agree this isn’t only unique but absolutely delicious. A very thoughtful and elegant departure from the norm.
Get Mirzam Chocolate here – http://bit.ly/mirzam
Kit 5 out of 5
Hans 5 out of 5