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Episode #94: Carlos Rolo & The Zero

Oh man it’s Easter Sunday and I need to use the bathroom. On the other hand – wait, nothing on my hand to begin with, but today is a special day, but this episode will come out on Thursday and it was recorded the prior week and we’re all out of Easter chocolate, so this has nothing to do with Easter. Enjoy.

Episode #94: Carlos Rolo & The Zero

Rolo – United States

IDK but these are enrobed in chocolate. That’s my take on it. Covered? Dipped? No. Enrobed.

Kit – 3 out of 5 stars

Hans – 1 out of 5 stars

Zero – United States

It’s a large white bowel movement with a lot of nougat and gravel.

Hans – 0.25 out of 5 stars

Kit – 2 out of 5 stars

Carlos V – Mexico

I often converse with Stumpy from North Little Rock on my daily early morning walks via Bluetooth headset. Conversation often goes to his mahjong game which has a character named Carlos Rivera who asks quite often to receive containers and food items. We agreed however that his product tasted really bad.

Kit – 0 out of 5 stars

Hans – 0 out of 5 stars

 

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Episode #91: Like The Legend Of The Creamy Bolus

After many months of meditating, it has come to our attention we completely forgot about all of you. Yes, we shirked our responsibility to the throngs of followers we have and decided to give a big ‘screw you’ to each and every one of you. But now, we’ve relented, and without apology, we resume our tasting and commenting on the various varieties of chocolate confections that you enjoy. These are trivial treats that make you feel as though life is worth living as you trudge through your days like a long walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night, drowsy and confused. With that, once again we bring you what you want.

Episode #91: Like The Legend Of The Creamy Bolus

Twix Cookies & Creme – United States

This one was a little confusing as it has an alright flavor, but it kind of left us feeling a little dirty. The creme also confused Hans as to whether it was caramel infused or not, however Kit was quick to point out the lack of caramel and corrected him accordingly.

Hans – 3 / 5 stars

Kit 3 / 5 stars

Kit Kat Duos Mocha+Chocolate – United States

We were both insensed and a bit disgusted with this one. The words we described these with were burnt and drudgery – Kit found the flavor a little burnt, and Hans found it not very enjoyable and kind of a chore in the chew department.

Kit – 1 out of 5 stars

Hans – 1 out of 5 stars

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Episode 66: Whipping The Belgian Guy

So I realized a few minutes ago there wasn’t an episode readied for you today. For that, I apologize. So here’s one. If you don’t like it, tough crap – we’re professionals here. We don’t have the time to listen to the whining of you people.

Episode 66: Whipping The Belgian Guy

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Episode 32: Nestle Smarties Reviews + Choco Lonely + Golden Alps

Miles had been bugging us for a couple days. Not really bugging; he’s a really sweet little boy – he would come up to us and say ‘Chocolate Breaaaaaak??’ Well, tonight we decided to let him stay up and do some chocolate breakdancing.

Tony’s Choco Lonely 51% Dark Chocolate With Almonds – Belgium

Miles picked this one, but didn’t want to taste it. Kind of a bummer.

Tony’s Choco Lonely – https://amzn.to/2JjEPJp

Kit – 2 out of 5

Hans – 2.5 out of 5

Nestle Smarties – Canada

Your basic answer to the M&M by Nestle. They’re a little different – thicker shells mainly. Miles wouldn’t try these either although he likes them. He’s trying to vex us.

Nestle Smarties – http://bit.ly/nestlesmarties

Kit – 2 1/2 out of 5

Hans – 2 1/2 out of 5

Golden Alps Milk Chocolate With Hazelnut – Switzerland

Found these up at the Real Canadian SuperStore – they’re made in Sitzerland for Canada’s Loblaws chain.

Golden Alps – http://bit.ly/goldenalps

Kit – 1 1/2 out of 5 stars

Hans – 2 out of 5 stars

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Episode 28: Violet Crumble & CHOMP!

My wife has rabies I think because she’s been apt to bite lately. I have known for years that she might have feral tendencies, but in this episode, you will see how she does indeed bite if provoked. She is a wild animal – and I would not want her any other way.

Cadbury Chomp – United Kingdom

A flat, wide bowel movement – visually. Thin chocolate and a lot of caramel.

Get yours here – http://bit.ly/cadbury-chomp

Kit – 4 out of 5 stars

Hans – 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

Nestle Violet Crumble – Australia

A walk back in time for Hans – a bar of honeycomb/sea foam enrobed in chocolate. Good but yeah.

Get it here – http://bit.ly/violetcrumble

Kit – 4 1/2 out of 5

Hans –  4.75 out of 5

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Episode 26: Nestle Yorkie Bar & Tony’s Choco Lonely Milk Chocolate Caramel + Sea Salt

A couple more found at the Cost Plus World Market – and the advent of Miles in our episodes! Watch and feel the magic!

Nestle Yorkie Raisin & Biscuit – United Kingdom

Bereft of Yorkshire Terrier to our sadness. We’re split on this one so you’ll have to give it a try.

Nestle Yorkie Bar – http://bit.ly/nestleyorkie

Kit – 4 out of 5 stars

Hans – 1 1/2 out of 5 stars

Tony’s Choco Lonely Milk Chocolate Caramel + Sea Salt – Belgium

Our second Choco Lonely from Tony’s – and another really nice one we both enjoyed.

Tony’s Choco Lonely Caramel + Sea Salt – http://bit.ly/chocolonelycaramel

Kit – 4 1/2 out of 5

Hans – 5 out of 5

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Episode 16: Eton Mess Pudding Bar & Nestle Lion Bar

We went out for ramen and it was great. Then we waltzed over to a Cost Plus World Market and found that they had chocolate bars. $70 and a lot f guilt later, here we are. Going in, I think these are both British bars. Let’s get to it.

Montezuma’s Chocolates Eton Mess Pudding Bar – United Kingdom

Strawberry flavor was almost raisin like and meringue bits were much like Violet Crumble/honeycomb. Some bitterness there.

Get ’em here – http://bit.ly/etonmesspuddingbar

Kit – 2 out of 5 stars

Hans –  3 out of 5 stars

Get ’em here – http://bit.ly/etonmesspuddingbar

Nestle Lion Bar – United Kingdom

A ‘busy bar’ with wafer and rice crisps… Nice chew to it and we were enthused.

Nestle Lion Bar – https://amzn.to/2Obk9Ao

Kit – 4.5 out of 5

Hans – 4.5 out of 5

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Episode 13: Aero Vanilla Truffle & Big Turk

Well, here we are. I haven’t done an update on this site since late January and it’s March. Hopefully I can crank a few of these out before Miriam wakes up.

These are yet two more varieties found up in Canada – I mean, who doesn’t like Canada? I think the Aero was from Walmart SuperCentre in Richmond, BC and the Big’R Turk from a little convenience store that had a guy with a medallion and a hairy chest on the way to the border. Let’s check ’em out.

Aero Truffle: Vanilla Truffle – Canada

Ladies and gentlemen, this made us wretch. Just like eating a stinky vanilla candle smells like. It hurt.

Get an Aero Truffle: Vanilla Truffle – http://bit.ly/aerovanilla

Hans – 0 stars

Kit – 0 stars

Nestle Big’R Turk – Canada

Turkish Delight is a really amazing and flavorful confection. Like a jelly covered in chocolate that has a lots of nice spiced flavor. Well, this one was like a knife in the eye of that concept. Take a Swedish Fish. Cover it in chocolate. Nothing wrong with chocolate covered Swedish Fish – I mean that’s great and all, but that is NOT what Turkish Delight is. Period!

Get some Big Turk! – http://bit.ly/bigturk

Hans – 3 stars

Kit – 4 stars

 

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Episode 8: Coffee Crisp & Aero Dark Cherry Truffle

‘What is this? What is this? Do you think I don’t know the law? Wasn’t it I who wrote it?’ Iconic lines from the character Auntie portrayed by Tina Turner in Max Max: Beyond Thunderdome. They have absolutely nothing to do with this episode, but a nice, light snack and a bubbly variety are here in this one-two punch from the great white north that is the sweet land of Canada.

Coffee Crisp – Canada

Growin up in Anacortes, Washington, Canadian television was easily found on the dial for Hans as a boy. Coffee Crisp commercials were constantly running, as well as commercials for cold and flu medications. It seems that Canadians must get the sniffles and yearn for something sweet most of the time.

Coffee Crisp – https://amzn.to/2WkLhlM

Kit – 3 1/2

Hans – 4

Aero Dark Cherry Truffle – Canada

Aero is interesting. These products get their name from all the holes in them – like they’re full of milk that had some kid blowing bubbles into it with a straw and then cooled and hardened quickly.

Aero chocolate – https://amzn.to/2S4gqKT

Kit – 4

Hans – 5